Relationships are hard.
One of the problems with relationships is that we don’t look at them as the living, breathing things that they are. They take care and attention, like if it were a living pet or child.
Think of your relationship as your first born child. Love it, pay attention to it, nurture it, and be committed to it. You will be gentler and more invested. Along with being more skillful when it comes to communication and conflict resolution.
Nurture Your Relationships
We nurture the connection when we are focused on how much we care about the relationship. At the same time we need to focus on what the other person is doing right instead of wrong. It will be infinitely healthier than if we don’t recognize it as a separate life force. Relationships are either healthy or struggling, and in need of both people’s care.
More relationships falter because they are neglected and treated without care than not. As they get unhealthy each individual feels a sense of loss and fear. It then spirals into increasingly destructive behavior, escalating the deterioration of the relationship. This cycle can shift through our mindset and our behavior.
Healthy relationships need respect, communication and consistency. As well as positivity and growth.
Try this:
1. Imagine your relationship as a living, breathing baby. (animal or human, you pick!) Picture it as real. Invision being able to hold it and care for it. Imagine it crying, needing, nourishment, cleaning, etc.
2. Keep focused on your care of the relationship. The relationship will only be as healthy as each individual. Inherently your own health is baked in. You and your partner will only be able to care for the relationship to the extent that you each are healthy.
3. Keep focused on what your partner does RIGHT in the care of the relationship. Speak to that with gratitude as you address anything you need their help on improving.
4. Don’t give up on the baby! The nature of the of the relationship can always shift. It can go from being a romantic relationship to one with less intimacy if need be. If the trust and respect with your partner (aka level of care) demands it. Remember that each of us is human and doing the best we can, whether we know it or not.
